It has become somewhat of a tradition over the last few years to present a Talent Show at our family gatherings (the kids' birthday party, Thanksgiving, Easter). The term 'Talent Show' is used loosely. There is often a whole lot of improv involved and a disproportionate amount of people wanting to be judges vs. performers.
Judgy, judgy, judgy...
The only prize is bragging rights and determining a winner is either exacting (like when we had 4 judges with score sheets and clipboards) or casual (the "audience" calling out scores on a scale of 1-10). We do have a Showrunner though, either me or Ebby ~shocker, right?
For this year's Thanksgiving talent show, Ebby took charge. She had a pad of paper, a pen, a really loud voice and desire to direct people (where does she get that??). She must be good though because she achieved a 90% participation rate, our highest number of acts yet!
I know the suspense is unbearable, here are the 'acts' in order of appearance...
Uncle did a dramatic reading of an original poem he'd written barely 30 minutes before in an effort to help Ebby with her French homework. The assignment was to write a letter or a poem to someone you love, real or imaginary. Right up Uncle's alley! He did a masterful job of blending creepy & romantic with stalker & heartfelt. Bravo, Uncle.
He arose from the couch, iPhone in hand. He proceeded to the television (a trek of about 4 feet). He stretched and bent his neck, he took a picture of the tv screen, he smiled, he sat down. The end.
But he got up there ~ good job, good effort Pa!
Oh Nana. After coyly announcing that she wasn't sure if we were having a talent show but she did print something out from the internet and stick it in her purse, Pa "introduced" Nana by playing the opening notes from her memorable performance a few years back of 'Surrey With the Fringe On Top'. Nana read a poem, not sure of the title but I believe it had the word 'Jane' in it. She was very much in character, using her dramatic voice and sweeping hand gestures. Her performance split the audience, with some fans (scores of 8 & 9) and some not-so-much fans (scores of 3 &4).
4. Will & Cuyler
Look, our first prop of the show! Sure, it's the ladder from their bunk beds with the broken, sharp-ish hooks at the end ~ what could go wrong? I think the original plan was for Will to climb the ladder whilst balancing it in the middle of the room. Cuyler started to spot him, there was some climbing & some balancing and Will assuming a Leo DiCaprio in Titanic pose atop the ladder and declaring 'I Am The Champion!'
But then, with lack of rehearsal time starting to show, they attempted some other trick that ended with the ladder (and the broken metal hooks) ripping a hole in both a quilt on the couch and Cuyler's brand new shirt. No blood though, so that was a win!
5. Interlude: Pa, Ebby, Bobby Law
Apparently Ebby can't resist a great prop so with the help of not one, but 2 spotters, she climbed all the way up the ladder to the ceiling! Which is about 3 feet.
6. Me & Ebby
No photo of this act per se, but I'm pretty sure we were spectacular. We danced our tootsies off to 'What Does the Fox Say' ~ 100% improv, Nana was was impressed with our sick moves.
In a fitting move, Bubbe sang and did the body motions for an abbreviated version of 'I'm A Little Teapot'. Perfect.
8. Bobby Law and Dr. Moody
Little did we know, we saved the best for last!
I'm pretty sure I've introduced Dr. Moody here on the blog before. He's not actually a doctor, but he plays one in our family talent shows. He's actually a puppet from J R Discount Outlet in North Carolina. Curiously, Dr. Moody has a German accent. Not sure how that happened, but it totally works.
Bobby Law and Dr. Moody teamed up for an act that was topical and hi-larious: a Q&A on the Affordable Care Act, aka Obamacare. We could. not. stop. laughing. Pa only got to record the first 15 seconds, but I tell you it was pure comedy gold in both the delivery and the content.
Q: Who is eligible for Obamacare?
A: ...You are eligible, and you are eligible and you... It's universal healthcare so if you live in the Universe, you are eligible!
Then Dr. Moody got fresh with Uncle after a question about how long children could be covered on their parents' policy.
Yes, this is totally one of those you-had-to-be-there moments (and I don't think anyone who was there will ever forget it!), but just trust me: we were all laughing to the point of tears. Literally ~ like the real literally.
So guess who won?
Yep, Bobby Law and Dr. Moody are now our reigning champions!
They are going to be a tough act to follow, I'd better start scheming now...